Netflix's Adolescence: Why did Jamie do it? Nature vs nurture and the family unit

This is an opinion piece that includes ***SPOILERS*** for the show.

Netflix’s Adolescence has sparked widespread discussion about the factors that led to Jamie’s horrific crime. Much of the conversation has focused on bullying, toxic online communities and radicalisation - a discussion we explored in detail in our previous article: Specialists explore the mental health themes in Adolescence.

But why did Jamie do it?

Well, for anyone who has watched the show, you'll know there isn't one single reason to explain why Jamie did what he did. What is clear, is that a culmination of factors and events happened in the lead-up to his devasting actions. The path to violence is rarely simple, and the warning signs often emerge long before a tragedy occurs.

We searched online to see what viewers took away from the show and one aspect that seems to have received less attention is Jamie’s family life.

In this article, we shift the focus away from Jamie’s individual experiences and look at Adolescence through one lens - the family unit.

If you need specialist mental health support for yourself or a loved one please don't heistate to contact our caring team in London today.

Credit: Netflix

The impact of father-son relationships on mental health

Jamie's father, Eddie, is a man who in his own way, tried to be better than the father who raised him. He chose not to be physically abusive, attempting to break the generational cycle of violence. However, in doing so, it appears he avoided emotional expression altogether, or at the very least minimised it.

Constantly ignoring our own emotions can take a toll on our self-confidence. Over time, we might start to believe that our needs and desires don’t matter, or that our voice isn’t valued. This can lead to feelings of stress, anxiety, or low mood, even if we don’t openly acknowledge them. When emotions are repeatedly suppressed, they don’t simply disappear - they can build up, sometimes resulting in frustration, resentment, or even deep-seated anger toward others. Unfortunately for Eddie and his family, his frustration and anger simmered beneath the surface, manifesting in cold distance, dismissiveness and the occasional outburst.

Jamie grew up watching his father with silent admiration, always seeking approval but rarely receiving it. One of the most gut-wrenching moments in Adolescence is Jamie’s recollection of being humiliated on the football field while grown men laughed at him. Instead of comfort, his father simply looked away. That moment cemented Jamie’s belief that failure made him unworthy.

This emotional neglect left Jamie vulnerable. He did not learn how to process failure, rejection, or insecurity in a healthy way. Instead, he sought validation from sources that framed his pain as proof of injustice.

"I didn't do anything wrong": Jamie’s belief system

Throughout Adolescence, Jamie repeats the phrase, "I didn’t do anything wrong" - not "I didn’t do it." What does this subtle distinction say about his belief system? Could it be that Jamie is not claiming innocence but rather justifying his actions? To him, what he did was not ‘wrong’ because he felt it was a logical response to his circumstances.

This warped sense of justice is a common theme in radicalised individuals who feel victimised by society. Instead of acknowledging wrongdoing, they see themselves as reacting to an unfair system.

In Adolescence, it seems Jamie’s upbringing, combined with his exposure to online extremist ideologies reinforced this mindset, making it easier for him to rationalise his actions.

Credit: Netflix

The manosphere and the rise of digital radicalisation

Online, Jamie found a community that validated his insecurities, but instead of helping him grow, it fuelled his resentment. He was fed toxic beliefs about masculinity and power - beliefs that eerily mirrored (even to a very minor degree) what he had observed at home.

His mother’s quiet subservience, his father’s unquestioned authority - these dynamics may have primed Jamie to accept the harmful narratives he encountered online. He learned that rejection wasn’t just painful but a deliberate act of cruelty against men like him. When Katie rejected him, it wasn’t just an awkward teenage moment. It was, in Jamie’s eyes, a confirmation that he had been robbed of his ‘rightful’ status as a man.

Studies show that young men who feel socially isolated are particularly susceptible to extremist ideologies. These groups offer them a distorted sense of belonging and control - an intoxicating combination for someone who has never felt truly seen or heard.

The hidden danger of ‘acceptable’ family dynamics

What makes Adolescence so unsettling is that Jamie’s family initially appears ‘ordinary.’ There is no overt abuse, no major scandal. And yet, beneath the surface, we see how the subtle reinforcement of traditional gender roles, emotional neglect and silence may have contributed to Jamie’s emotional and psychological instability.

His father works long hours, while his mother is often seen in the kitchen, maintaining the home. Eddie is the dominant figure in the household - not through overt aggression, but through an unspoken authority that shapes the family dynamic. Jamie’s mother and sister instinctively adjust their behaviour to avoid conflict, reinforcing the idea that women must accommodate the emotional states of men.

Jamie, in turn, internalises these unspoken rules, learning that men hold power, women adapt, and emotions should be suppressed.

This raises broader questions about the traditional nuclear family model, the roles ascribed to men and women, and the societal expectations placed on both. While there is ongoing debate about the efficacy of these structures, what remains critical is that children have access to healthy role models and meaningful emotional connections.

Eddie’s struggle: the weight of breaking the cycle

Eddie expresses his desire to be a good father, specifically stating that his only goal was to avoid being like his own father—aiming to be present and non-abusive. In his mind, not being violent was enough to make him a ‘good dad.’ However, by focusing solely on avoiding physical abuse, he failed to recognise that emotional absence can be just as harmful.

This is made painfully clear in Episode 3 when Jamie is asked by the Clinical Psychologist whether his father is “loving.” His response, “No, that’s weird.” reveals just how deeply ingrained this emotional disconnect has become. To Jamie, paternal affection is unfamiliar, even unnatural.

Eddie’s struggle as a parent reflects a broader societal issue: many men have never been taught how to express emotions in a healthy way. Masculinity is often equated with stoicism, and as a result, many men believe that simply being present and providing financially is enough.

This reluctance to engage emotionally is reflected in mental health statistics - according to the Mental Health Foundation, only 36% of NHS talking therapy referrals are for men, highlighting a significant gap in men seeking psychological support. But as Jamie’s story tragically illustrates, children need more than a roof over their heads. They need emotional connection, guidance, and open communication.

Preventing future cases: how can we support vulnerable young men?

One question Adolescence ultimately forces us to ask is: How many young boys are currently walking Jamie’s path, unnoticed, in households that look just like his?

Early intervention is key. Parents, educators, and mental health professionals must create environments where young men feel safe discussing their emotions. Schools could incorporate emotional literacy programmes that challenge outdated notions of masculinity and encourage vulnerability. Online safety measures and digital literacy education can also help young people critically evaluate harmful ideologies they may encounter online.

For families, acknowledging and addressing emotional neglect is crucial. Fathers, in particular, should be encouraged to model healthy emotional expression, showing their sons that strength is not about suppressing feelings but about understanding and managing them.

Credit: Netflix

Seeking help: Schoen Clinic’s role in adolescent mental health

At Schoen Clinic, we understand the complexities of adolescent mental health and the importance of early support. Our specialists provide expert care for young people struggling with emotional regulation, family dynamics, and self-esteem issues. Through therapy and tailored interventions, we help adolescents and their families navigate challenges, fostering resilience and emotional well-being.

If you are concerned about a young person in your life, reaching out for professional support can make all the difference. Mental health struggles don’t have to go unnoticed - help is available, and change is possible.

Contact our caring team today. We're here to help.